dying wishes oneshot
by belphegorluv
Summary: the attack of another famiglia, all the guardians fighting hard, and at this time... Tsuna... read on to find out


Kill me.

Kill me now.

I'm sorry I'm a coward, like usual, but this time I'll always let you call me useless Tsuna. I admit it.

Kill me, please.

Before I die, before you kill me, please tell Kyoko I liked her.

I never got the courage to say it again. Never before, and I never will either.

Heh. Now that I think of it, I would have been some use to Mukuro. But 'cause I was that wimpy, that scared, I never gave him my body.

What if it hurt? What if I was lonely?

Now, it's too late.I'm dying anyways. He wouldn't want my body.

Oh, and tell Haru sorry that I never got to marry her, never let her wear the white flowing dresses, or the traditional Japanese clothing she described to me time after time, over and over. Na, Tsuna-san.

Now it's all too late.

Can't move anymore, just pinned to the ground like a coward.

Hibari was right. I should have never grouped together with my Famiglia.

I was the one that made them suffer all this time. But I miss it, all the fun memories. So selfish of me to think that.

I wonder what Ryohei would say to Kyoko. Another lie? Well, all for the better. At least she won't cry. Maybe just believe I'm permanently injured somewhere, a terrible lie, but she'd believe it.

Ma. Ma. Yamamoto, how funny whenever I think of you, I just remember that word.

Ma, ma, it's fine. Ma, ma, don't worry. Now, it's my turn to say it to you, my friend, ma, ma, don't worry for me.

Gokudera. Hem. It's a wonder how I always smile when I think of you.

In the end, we did go see fireworks together, eh? We did go eat sushi together, have a great time, but now I need to say good-bye.

And please don't follow me.

Ah. The pain just flowing through my body. I would have screamed out, itei, itei, but now I don't have that energy anymore. Still pinned to the ground. Coward.

Kill me now and just get it over with. Please.

No, no, you say, I need to get over this by myself.

I close my eyes.

Xanxus's hands, his gun, his liger. How I remember the first time I battled him full on, the first time I had to freeze someone. How shocked he looked, how angered he looked.

You watched all along, just smiling at times, frowning at times, but never did you give up your belief in me. I'm sorry, I let you down.

Now I remember all the Varia battles. Oh, how horrible it was, how tough it was, but how together our entire group was.

I'm sorry, I let our group down.

Don't apologize, you say, but I can't help it. Those glasses full of memories just blast inside of myhead, one after another, and then another, and another…just all surging through.

They're smiling at me. Varia. They smile and hold out their weapons, slash it at me. I know it's only an illusion, it's the enemy just coming forth and slashing their weapons…but I wish it were the Varia instead. At least it wouldn't be another family killing ours.

You lay a hand on my face, I smile. Did you feel pity? Did you understand me at last? Were you going to take care of me, let me die easily?

No.

You slap me. Once, twice, three times. Wake up, you say, but I am awake. Much awake, more awake than I have ever been. Never noticed all this beauty, all these great people around me before. But now, it's too late.

Footsteps. Closer,closer, closer.

Please, I whisper,please kill me now. You jump away from my body, hesitating to give a kick at my face, then, continue on your path.

No! I shout inside my head, I don't want to lose another friend. Just another cowardly thought I have. I can't do anything. Useless Tsuna, you always called me, and I admit, I am. Utterly useless after all.

I hear clashing and slashing, and shouting and yelling, and footsteps. Nearer, nearer, nearer. A foot on my face.

Wake up, they say,wake up and meet your fate. This is my fate already. Half dead, paralyzed on the ground, nothing to do, nothing to say, not a psst nor a hiss. Just silence from me.

Is he dead? They ask each other, they pinch me, kick me, punch me, slash me with their swords. Just more and more cuts and wounds on my flesh, but I don't feel a thing.

Numb already.

You're weak. You're weak. You're weak. A voice hisses inside my brain. I know, I know, I know, I yell back but it keeps on taunting me, tugging on my soul more and more, still not satisfied. I get kicked more and more, and I feel like I'm losing my grip on my soul.

Yamamoto smiles. I smile back, but my mouth doesn't move an inch. He laughs and pats me on the back, I laugh, but my mouth still doesn't move an inch. He's the same old Yamamoto. But then I remember where I am, who I am, and I stop laughing. He disappears like the face on the magical mirror of the evil Queen in Snow White.

Faces flash by, each haunting me and bringing me into worlds that are full of delusions. Kicks. My ribs, my shoulders, my legs, my arms, just bones snapping off, failed branches on old willow trees.

I'm sorry. I failed you all.


End file.
